Questioning. Uncertainty. Shaky ground.
What does it take to question? What does it take to NOT KNOW?
What does it take to be able to stand on shaky ground and keep your balance? Or maybe you fall, but what does it take to go there?
Courage, a thirst for openness, trust in self. Willingness to get it wrong. Willingness to own up to the mistakes you know you will make.
Willingness to trust that even in that place of shaky ground, even when you fall, you know that you will be okay. You trust yourself to get back up, even if you continue to fall, over and over again.
Willingness to admit, that you’ve never had all the answers, and you never will. Willingness to grow. Willingness to try new things, to learn new ways, to allow the constant death of the ego.
The ego will want you to be right, to defend yourself at all costs, to hold your stance, to think you know best, that you already are perfect, that there is no more growth for you, that you cannot get anything wrong, because you are an adult, and adults are supposed to have it all together, and if you don’t, you’ll look weak in front of the others… and looking weak means you are weak, and that means certain death.
Oh, this ego, here to protect you. It has kept you alive. It wants to put up all the walls. The walls are sometimes necessary. Sometimes, the ego kicks in and saves your life. Of course, that’s why ego is here with us. It serves a purpose, and for that we can be grateful.
The walls that are put up to protect you from harm can keep out the love and connection that your heart desires.
The walls that are put up to protect you from harm can keep you from growing any bigger than the wall structure that is already in place.
It is safe for you to be vulnerable, to be open, to not know or be certain.
Sure, it doesn’t feel safe at first. It feels scary, maybe like you may die.
But, dear one, do you wish to live life afraid of dying, or live life being open to living?
Anchor into your heart, relax and breathe into your belly, find people who you feel safe with, where you are free to expand and grow.